Only Murders In The Building star Martin Short guest hosted Jimmy Kimmel Live! on Monday night (June 24) and used his monologue to roast Donald Trump, Joe Biden, and even his long-time friend and co-star, Steve Martin.
Before tackling the monologue, Short turned to Kimmel’s regular late-show sidekick, Guillermo Rodriguez, and asked, “What would Jimmy usually do right now?”
“He would be talking about Donald Trump,” Rodriguez replied.
“Well, I guess you can’t go to Outback Steakhouse without ordering the Bloomin’ Onion,” Short responded before going into his monologue and taking aim at the former U.S. president.
“Donald Trump says he’s close to announcing his running mate, and has reportedly narrowed it down to three people. It was four, but O.J. died,” Short quipped.
The comedian then focused in on junior United States senator J.D Vance, one of the frontrunners to become Trump’s running mate. Vance had previously made disparging comments about Trump, which Short was quick to remind everybody about.
“[He] said he thought Trump was either a cynical a**hole like Nixon, or America’s Hitler. When have you ever said something like that about someone, and then changed your mind?” Short said.
The Arrested Development actor also touched on the upcoming presidential debate and the potential age-related issues of Trump and Biden. Specifically, he drew attention to Trump’s demand that a drug test be administered before the debate as he believes Biden will be taking a special drug to help him through the event.
“[Trump] says he wants them both to submit to a drug test before the debate. Do you have any idea how long it takes to get a urine sample from men who are close to 80?” Short joked. “I’m 74, and the only time I don’t have to pee is when I’m peeing.”
As his monologue came to a close, Short’s Only Murders in the Building co-star Martin walked out on stage to interrupt proceedings. The comedy duo then started throwing insults back and forth.
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“I was honored when Jimmy asked me to be the first guest host, but I said no,” Martin stated. “I said, ‘You’ll be able to find someone who’ll do it for scale. Don’t you worry.’”
Short added that he appreciated Martin being there, quipping, “There are very few people in this world that I truly admire, and Steve Martin is very close to being one of them.”
Martin returned with a cutting barb, telling the audience, “What a joy it is for me to work with someone who looks like a former women’s tennis champion.”
Short then shooed Martin off the stage, telling him, “It’s almost time for the interview, so you better go yell at the staff one more time… Walk toward the light, Steve! Walk toward the light!”
You can watch Short’s full opening monologue above.
Jimmy Kimmel Live!, Weeknights, 11:35/10:35c, ABC
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